You
have reached the most important part of becoming a pimp.
After you complete this step, you can officially be called
a pimp. The other 4 steps are just the finishing touches.
My man, its time for you to get yourself a hoe.
Now,
it is physically impossible to be a pimp without owning
a hoe. Owning a hoe is what constitutes being a pimp. They
go hand in hand, like puppies and chainsaws. Of course,
hoes don't just appear out of nowhere. You've got to go
out and find yourself a hoe. And no, Regis Philbin will
not suffice.
You've
got to know where to look. Lounging around some skanky bar
looking for your regular old prostitute isn't going to cut
it. You've got to look where you'd least expect it. Like
the library. Or the car wash. Or the United States Supreme
Court. Keep an eye out for hoe material. Sure signs of a
hoe-worthy female are tight pants, low cleavage, and big
signs that say "Hi. Would you like to have sex with
me?" If you see a nice-looking lady, make sure to approach
her and talk to her. She doesn't count as a hoe unless you
tell her about it. Start to sweet talk her, maybe buy her
a drink, then drop her this line:
"SEX
ME WOMAN!"
Works
like a charm. Whatever you do though, don't stare incessantly
at her boobies. That's for step 5.
