listen real closely, because looking like a pimp is the most
important step in your journey to pimpdom. People will never
know that you're a pimp unless you look like one. You want
to look like you're ready to do anything or anyone. Alright
now, the first thing that you're gonna need is a pimpin' hairdo.
You need a cool hairdo: something that says "Hey, Im
a pimp. Would you like to do it doggy style with me?".
Personally, I recommend the afro. I used to sport it during
my golden years. The perm or corn rows work well too. Sideburns
are a necessity. Nothing says pimp like some big sideburns.
And, no, mullets and ponytails are NOT acceptable.
you've got the hairdo down, you need to pick up some big pimpin'
threads. Fur coats work best. Its physically impossible to
not score when wearing a fur coat. Unless you're Tony Danza.
Under the fur coat, put on a disco shirt, some skin-tight
flares, and approximately 4.8 pounds of jewelry. Top it all
off with some nice leather boots, and you'll be a pimp in
no time. But dressing like a pimp isn't all there is to it.
Move on to step 2.